2004-02-06
After approximately three weeks of being able to breathe freely, my cold returned. I completely lost my sense of smell and taste, which put a big damper on my appetite. I mean, I got hungry, so I'd eat the things I usually eat, but it was pretty much a chore. The good news is that I can now wear the smallest pre-pregnancy jeans. I guess that's good--I get some satisfaction out of it, but it actually feels pretty meaningless. I mean, my life is not really any different.
Clay now says things such as, "I got new puzzle," "love you, daddy," "Mommy very pretty hair," and "Want to see Ria" (one of his beloved teachers is Maria). Also, "I like na. Milk is goot."
Yes, he's still bellying up to the milk bar. I'm hoping he'll lose interest one of these days but for the time being it's okay. I have yet to resume menstruation, which I gather is pretty unusual. I don't mind not having had a period in almost three years, though I suppose that'll change if we decide we want to roll the dice and have another kid. Jury still out on that one.
Last week B outed me to our daycare provider. One day she opened late due to snow and when B dropped C off she asked if he'd had breakfast. B said no and she gave him a disapproving look and feeling the need to defend himself, he said "Well, he did nurse." And she expressed her incredulity quite loudly. I was bracing myself for her giving me a hard time, and had even prepared a response. She's always going on about Clay's intelligence, so I was going to say, "Hey, how do you think he got so smart?" But she hasn't said a word.
After an incident last weekend, I have been forbidden from going anywhere near Clay with scissors. B thinks I butchered his hair, and I kind of did, though I actually believe Clay looks cuter than ever. He looks kind of French. In a good way. Even B said he thought C was going through a cute spurt lately. Also, he's being especially charming this week. It's funny how they can just be miserable for a few days and then suddenly all sunshine.
I'm terminating things with my shrink. Not because of any shortcomings of his; I've really grown to think highly of him. No, it's because my employer switched insurance companies and the new one basically requires me to be seriously depressed or anxious or suicidal before they'll shell out for therapy. And I don't really feel like shelling out $100 a pop. And I've been feeling so much better. So, we're wrapping things up and I feel pretty good about it. I like knowing that he will be around when/if I feel the need to resume. Today was our penultimate session; next week will be our last. I do not believe we will hug.
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