2001-12-30
Friday 1:45 pm
Contractions begin, five minutes apart.
Friday 7 pm
Contractions three minutes apart.
Friday 8 pm
Leave house for hospital.
Friday 9 pm
Arrive in triage. Four centimeters dilated.
Friday 9 pm to Saturday 12 am
Active labor begins. Increasingly strong and painful contractions two minutes apart. Manage pain through TENS unit, lower back massage from doula, vocalization (i.e., screaming my head off).
Saturday 12 am
Seven centimeters dilated. While sitting on toilet, vomiting into basin, water breaks into toilet with loud splash.
Saturday 12 am to 1:25 am
Transition. Increasingly strong and painful contractions, mostly endured while sitting on birthing ball, leaning forward onto husband's lap. Rely increasingly on doula and howling like a shot animal to manage pain.
Saturday 1:25 am
Nine centimeters dilated with just a lip of cervix remaining. Intense pushing urge which doula tells me I must fight. Well-intentioned but annoying nurse says, "If you push now you'll damage your cervix and make things harder." I reply: "Don't threaten me!"
Saturday 1:30 am
After killer contraction, I say, "I really have to push!" Nurse examines me and finds I am at 10 centimeters. Doula tells me I can push.
Saturday 1:30 am to 2 am
I lie on my side on the table, husband lfiting upper leg, while drill sargeant doula barks pushing orders at me. "Breathe! Breathe! Tuck your chin! Push push push push push!"
Doctors and husband stand at foot of bed, incredulous.
Doula: "Push harder! Push longer! You're not pushing hard enough!"
Me: "Is this pushing doing anything at all?"
Doctors and husband laugh. "We're looking at the baby's hair! Do you want to see? We can get a mirror."
Me: "I don't want to open my eyes."
Saturday 2:03 am
I feel the baby's head begin to emerge. I push. "The head is out!" I continue to push. "Here come the shoulders!"
They place the baby on top of me. I am completely incredulous.
The baby weighs eight pounds ten ounces. His name is Clay. I'm probably biased, but I think he's pretty funny looking.
Clay, approximately five minutes old.
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