2001-12-05
Trying to decide what to do with myself today. So far I've made muffins (blueberry corn with whole grain corn meal) and that's about it.
I'm considering an excursion to Target and maybe a matinee of Shallow Hal at the adjacent multiplex. One of the books I read specifically suggested seeing movies during these last weeks of pampering oneself.
Later now. I made it to Target but not to the movies. Target in the middle of a weekday is a different place than I'm used to. It's the world of women. All kinds of places are this way, it's turning out. I'm used to being out in public--the little that I am in public--on weekends and evenings, the occasional lunch hour. It's so odd to me, the notion of not going to a job every day. Will four months away from work reverse the situation, so that it seems normal to not have to go?
When will this baby arrive? I really have no intuition on the matter. It could be tomorrow, it could be a month from tomorrow. Statistically I guess the likeliest time is in two and a half weeks; first-time mothers most often go 41 weeks, or one week past the standard "due date." The teacher of our childbirth class said they might even revise the famous pregnancy wheel to reflect this reality.
I am not in a huge rush for things to get started; I'm kind of enjoying this time. Physically I'm feeling pretty good. My weight gain seems to have levelled off at 35 pounds (though I suppose I could have another growth spurt). I can still tie my shoes and shave my legs, things I've heard tell that some women find nearly impossible by this point. I wonder if this stuff means I have a long way to go. It's all so unpredictable--that's the very essence of this situation, and I guess part of what makes it exciting. The mystery, the unknowability. I'm having a farily easy time giving myself over to that.
And the loot keeps pouring in. Most recently a diaper bag backpack from B's sister and a stroller from his mother. Both are items I picked out. The backpack is black, the stroller has a leopard motif. Will I grow weary of the animal print? At least it beats the cloying pastels of so much baby stuff and the most popular pastel alternative, navy blue, has never been a favorite of mine.
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