2001-12-17

Still here, still pregnant. Amniotic sac still intact (I know because my doctor checked today). Still at one centimeter dilation, cervix still soft. Baby's head is way down low. I figured some dropping had occurred because when I stood on the scale this morning, I couldn't see the numbers; my belly suddenly blocked my view in a way it hadn't yesterday, indicating that the baby's position was now less vertical as his head descended deeper into my pelvis.

I haven't much energy. I woke up around eight, ate a pear. At some point I went upstairs to get something and the bed looked so inviting I lay back down and slept until ten. Once I awoke, I did something I've been putting off--selected CDs to take to the hospital. We still haven't unpacked our music, lacking any reasonable shelving solutions, so B took out a box that I believe contained only a subset of our combined collection. I went through, in search of music both familiar and soothing. Here's what I came up with:

After that I ate some lunch and then B and I got out the canoe and took a few spins around the lake. There were a ton of ducks out there, some on the lake and some on the grass on the far side. Those on the lake took off as we approached but the others stayed put so we could look at them; they were some very good-looking ducks.

When we were done it was time for me to head to the doctor where I learned all I mentioned above. I now feel as though it's going to be a while before labor starts. Just a hunch. No idea how long, but it no longer feels as imminent as it did a day or two ago. Maybe because she said, "This baby will be here within two weeks." Well, it had better be! I mean, I know she can't really tell much and it would be senseless to make any other kind of prediction, but that really made me feel as though it's going to be some time.

And that's okay. At least at the moment it is. I'm not yet dying to get this kid out of me. I feel fairly sleepy and low-energy--when I got home I took another nap from five to six-thirty--but considering how little I have to do, that's okay. I don't think I could conduct anything resembling a normal kind of life right now but I don't have to. I can take long naps and sit around.

After my second nap of the day B and I watched Seinfeld and I made dinner, after which I made two pans of lasagne to freeze for the first couple weeks during which supposedly every ounce of energy goes into self and baby-care. It's cooling now; I guess I'll cut it into big chunks and wrap them in foil.

It's ten now, and I'm not sure what to do with myself. I'm not ready for bed. Part of the motivation behind all this napping--besides being sleepy--is wanting to be rested lest I go into labor (I kind of assume that I'll go into labor in the wee hours as most women do). But I don't want to mess up my schedule so that I'm up all night. Oh, whatever.

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