2004-03-03
[I just put up another entry written a few days ago.]
Sometimes I feel like such a freak. And I think I am unusual in the degree to which I'm ruled by logic. I read this about consuming and possibly irrational concerns of a parent for his child, and the many comments that say such worry is the practically the definition of parenthood, and I just think "Huh?"
I certainly have concerns about Clay, primarily regarding his social and intellectual development, and I do spend some time pondering the choices that will affect these--where we live, what schools he attends, how much television he watches. I'm also mildly concerned about his dental health (I had terrible teeth as a child) and his weight (an issue both B and I have struggled with) so I try to help him establish good habits in those areas. But I believe these are all pretty reasonable things to care about.
As an aside, I also believe that at this moment in this country, so many decisions are driven by corporate profitability and utter indifference to the wellbeing of individuals that to go with the flow is to let a child down.
But I rarely experience fears or worries about Clay's physical safety. Or my own, for that matter. It just seems so unlikely. I mean, I always wear seat belts and make sure Clay is safely ensconced in his car seat, but that feels like the extent of it. I feel like I control the stuff I can control and don't really worry about the rest.
Am I cold-hearted or just preternaturally calm? Maybe both.
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